Me & the boys; Surfside, TX

Go, go, go.
Scribble it down on a torn napkin.
Sleep tonight, Weave tomorrow.
Don’t forget.

Did you know that sea stars have light sensors on the tips of their arms?

Have you ever watched a sea star somersault?

Have you ever felt one cling to your hand?

This dress. I whipped it up last night on a sewing machine that I hardly deserve. As per the instruction in the pattern, it only took me eleven stitches and a half an hour, but that seemed like a lot of work at the time. And the belt isn’t really working, but it’s a good excuse to shop for a wider one.
I have a hundred reasons to avoid my sewing machine, but as much as I like lists, it would bore you to tears reading a list of whiney excuses. Know that, at the top of the list is: two boys under 5, under my feet, all day long. And right under that? Very little patience.

Spring covered up what stood bare months before. Under a moonlit sky, dark circles drape the lawn and driveway like velvet blankets, shadows under the unfurled crepe myrtle and ornamental plum. I whack my head in the night’s shade on a low branch that is heavy with young foliage, and walk out, cursing, to my car.

Layer upon layer, Spring spackles up the landscape where Winter fails to slough. Years pass. The prickly pear cactus has budded and bloomed into an agglomeration of ovals, a colony. Little green pup ears stand atop careworn gray sections, each pup is topped with a flaming yellow flower.

There is some serious primping going on.

Night sounds have multiplied. The mockingbird’s soliloquy rambles like a long ribbon across the tapestry of night music, over the tiny drone of crickets and the clicking of bats. Sometimes the Chuck Will’s Widows interrupt the peace with their harrowing calls, hammering from cavernous throats. White Wing dove keep cooing after hours, still love-drunk.

Day sounds too, they have bustled out of bounds. It’s a denser panorama, a flourishing of things everywhere: the chortling of swallows and Purple Martins, hissing wrens, bossy jays. After a rain, the Cardinal leads the symphony with its intense love song. Focused, the calls are sculpted, intricate and metered like gingerbread on a Victorian cottage. And while most female birds silently acknowledge their mate’s serendades, the female cardinal responds clearly, without upstaging her man.

While she broods, I watch the male gently stuff her mouth with little morsels. I wonder if it’s appealing to her, what he’s brought to the table. Does she even care? Before Chas was born, I requested sushi and beer to be delivered bedside after his arrival. Instead, we shared a bag of cold Egg McMuffins. I guess we get whatever’s available in the wild, or at 5am in the hospital.

…You know, he still could have filled that order later that evening, or the next day, damnit. But I never got the damned dinner I asked for. And that’s where I differ from the cardinal…
….I totally forgot where I was going with this.

Put a paintbrush in your mouth for family art time. Take a deep breath. No matter how many times you’ve cleaned up today, this will be the biggest mess. I can’t wait to see more fun at Studio Friday.

In the morning, it’s the last thing I do. I dunk the special black comb with wide and narrow teeth into a tall glass, filled with water. I take a deep breath, forgetting to exhale, and recruit ten seconds and a truckload of patience.

You hear the water running, see me step forward with the glass and comb, and your eyes suddenly spark behind an impish grin. Suddenly, you are tearing through the house, little feet thumping across carpet, patting excitedly atop tile. Unleashed giggles bounce in your wake. I grope for a lock of hair and get nothing but a flurry of laughter and air.

It’s like wool back there: the comb would stand straight if you would sit still, but away you prance and the poor comb bounces in place atop your head like a clinging tranquilizer dart. You disappear behind a corner and discover a forgotten toy.

I kneel behind you as you play with the toy car. Sections of hair at a time, I gently unweave tiny dreads from the night before. Your hair is fine flax. As I arrange it, tame it with comb and water, you begin to look more like a normal toddler boy and less like a normal Chas.

Sloping waves mount each other in back, I swoop longish locks over one another, rounding my way forward to frame your face. The comb easily slides through your fringe in front; it is immune to your rowdy tossing in bed and tantrums in the carseat. I swing the comb down and around your cheek, parting it left. You grin, suddenly noticing me. With both hands, you grab my cheeks and screech! I see your tiny, perfectly round molars in back, and your squinting blue eyes coax me to drop the comb and tickle you.

After we stop laughing, we both sigh. Then, speechless with a hand over my mouth, I watch you tousle your hair up joyfully as a dog on a dungheap. When you are finished, you check my reaction with a curled lower lip and shadowed eyes, trying to mask your grin. But I see it! And we both acknowledge our dueling gumption.

He’s back. He’s finally back. I am picking up plastic pretend syringes off the floor, the ones the pharmacist gave the kids for their pretend medicine chest, and removing them out of sight along with all other bottles and measuring spoons. I’ve placed them in a wicker basket and set it all high on the shelf in the bathroom.

I have packed a picnic bag, loaded the bike and trailer, applied sunscreen and breathed a sigh of relief into the mirror. My reflection reminds me that it’s time for some self-maintenance: a brush and lip gloss will do, for now. We are off to the veloway, to weave in and out of the post oak savannah and meadows laced with wildflowers and a fresh litter of rain lilies. It’s gorgeous out there!

So how do we warm up for a day away from home? We try on the pants that Kath sent us. The cuffs encourage lots of kicking and running. I love them! Thanks, Kath.

We have been battling Ford’s immune response since late Saturday night, alternating doses of ibuprofin and acetominophin, but his fever is stubborn. I’m watching him toss, waiting for a drop in temperature (without relief, it has climbed as high as 106 F). He is frail and hot. As if laboring in his sleep; his breath has a heavy effort, and occasionally he will mutter dreamspeak: stifled pleas dampened by the weight of sleep. All I can do is lay beside him, sleeplessly rubbing the deep furrow in my brow. These are long nights, half slept with the lights left on. All countertops are cluttered with discarded plastic safety wrap, barely-sipped glasses of water, sticky syrup syringes, half-empty analgesic bottles. In limbo, I’ll eventually round up and declutter, after I spend ten minutes trying to focus my thougths, after I’m convinced the fever is low enough to condone sleep.

More robots at Illustration Friday.